Post by Nicole on Feb 15, 2006 15:34:05 GMT -5
Apparently there is a "web fad" regarding Chuck Norris. Pretty corny, but if you like corny you'll get a chuckle. Someone sent me this but said if you look up chuck norris on google you're bound to find the web fad sites.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris' blood type is D.O.A.
Vin Diesel's hair is too afraid of Chuck Norris to grow.
The only thing that keeps Chuck Norris going is the fact that somewhere, someone is watching Delta Force 2.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris can bench-press the moon.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
The wind generated by the speed of one Chuck Norris roundhouse kick is enough to blow the clothes off of 37 women.
Bruce Lee's death (brain swelling) was directly related to Chuck Norris receiving second place to him in a martial arts contest. Coincidence? Norris doesn't think so.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Achilles was supposedly the greatest warrior of all time, but he died because of his weak spot, the Achilles tendon. There is no Chuck Norris tendon. You do the math.
Guns don't kill people, Chuck Norris does.
It is Chuck Norris' eye that adorns the Great Seal on the back of the $1 bill. He is all seeing.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
Chuck Norris has a word for a person he puts into a coma; that word is "lucky".
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
The sun doesn't actually rise or set. Chuck Norris simply claps twice.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
David Banner gets mad and turns into the Hulk. The Hulk gets mad and turns into Chuck Norris.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris' blood type is D.O.A.
Vin Diesel's hair is too afraid of Chuck Norris to grow.
The only thing that keeps Chuck Norris going is the fact that somewhere, someone is watching Delta Force 2.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris can bench-press the moon.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
The wind generated by the speed of one Chuck Norris roundhouse kick is enough to blow the clothes off of 37 women.
Bruce Lee's death (brain swelling) was directly related to Chuck Norris receiving second place to him in a martial arts contest. Coincidence? Norris doesn't think so.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Achilles was supposedly the greatest warrior of all time, but he died because of his weak spot, the Achilles tendon. There is no Chuck Norris tendon. You do the math.
Guns don't kill people, Chuck Norris does.
It is Chuck Norris' eye that adorns the Great Seal on the back of the $1 bill. He is all seeing.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
Chuck Norris has a word for a person he puts into a coma; that word is "lucky".
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
The sun doesn't actually rise or set. Chuck Norris simply claps twice.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
David Banner gets mad and turns into the Hulk. The Hulk gets mad and turns into Chuck Norris.
