Post by LilliHart on Feb 12, 2006 17:10:01 GMT -5
Dear Destra,
Thank you for replying in the manner that you have. You have given me much food for thought and also helped me to clarify my own next step on my journey.
Recently I have been wondering what it is that has made it so difficult for me to make myself understood, not only to yourself, but to others who are outside the forum.
I have noticed that since the energies have shifted in the last few months I have attempted to communicate with words that had a meaning in the older energies but no longer have the same meaning.
Since I spend so much time spread over several dimensions simultaneously I have often come here and to other situations to which I am called and brought with me energies that are not necessarily of the space I am in and this may be causing some of the confusion.
So my attempts to communicate have often been confounded by my own inability to use the correct words for the concepts I am talking about AND by using the incorrect words for the energetic space I am in. So I thank you for giving me the opportunity to practice by using the correct words to express my thoughts and also an arena in which to do so. I will attempt to match the energies and make my points clear.
But this being a discussion I can only take responsibility for my half of what I perceive as the miscommunication.
The other half of course is the responsibility of the other person.
Having spent all my current life working in the deep metaphysical arena I have often has the opportunity to think very highly of myself and what I know…and have also had the opportunity to fall into my own egoic patterns of thinking that there was nothing left for me to know or to learn or that there was no one who could teach me anything more.
Even when I would go to groups or conferences seeking to learn something new I would often act as though I knew it all and didn’t need to open to anything further. The ego is a strange and elusive thing. It helped to make me defensive and inaccessible to that very thing I sought the most.
This Destra is what I think is getting between you and I from your side of the equation. This is NOT a criticism of you, merely an observation and one you asked me for several times in your posts. You have asked me what it is I see or mentioned something about the ‘opinion I have formed of you’.
Please don’t single this comment out of my response because if you do you will miss the point. J I am not judging this nor am I making it a right/wrong thing. I also don’t want to get off track in this thread and have it go to a he said/she said thing or a “have to defend or takes sides with one or the other”.
I admire and respect what you ‘appear’ to be doing on your own path. I say ‘appear’ because I can only respond to what I am reading here. But I will give you my open, unabashed feedback here.
I think it is very common for people of knowledge and training to fall into the trap of ego and inaccessibility. I also think it is very common for people in this state to be overly sensitive to any comments that might be perceived as criticism and to then miss the point of what the other is saying. That is the ego defending it’s precarious stance so as not to crumble into a pile of dust leaving the person in a shambles of confusion and disillusionment.
In my original post in this thread I mentioned you by name because the subject matter of this post is very relevant to you and also I have offered it to you in the thread about your cheek and the ‘thing’ on it. Twice I was misunderstood in my attempt to get my point across.
Here, you initially asked me how you can deal with forum members who are abusive in some way or another. I gave you an answer but I suspect you did not do what I suggested, did you? Did you actually sit down and do the exercise?
My sense tells me you have remained in your head about this problem and not allowed yourself to go into your feelings and heart and follow the simple directions. I said to you and all that if you do this exercise correctly you will be surprised by what comes out on the other side. From your more recent comments I sense you have not even tried this.
Instead you ‘assumed’ I was alleging you were a ‘confrontational’ person. I never said that, only that I thought you and this guy were locking horns, in other words not seeing eye-to-eye on something.
Actually now that you mention it, I DO INDEED think you are confrontational, but not in a traditional, hard-nosed aggressive manner…rather in a more occult, argumentative manner. It seems you want to have your way…You asked for help, got a direct answer and then didn’t follow the guidance and came back feeling accused and opening up a kind of argumentative confrontation looking for something which I will not nor cannot give you. Answers that are outside yourself.
You said, “However in this case, after having given this to the Angels and letting their wisdom wash upon me, I feel the only lesson provided to me here is to stay steadfast in my responsibility to my forum energy.”
Ah, but this is the first place where the ego enters and not only that but you put this outside yourself instead of going inside and doing this simple little exercise I showed you.
If the only lesson you learned was to stay steadfast in your responsibility to your forum then you have entirely missed the point. This guy is your teacher and a very good one too. I imagine he will plague the crap out of you and your forum until you learn the real lesson that is awaiting you. And I am not going to tell you what it is because I don’t want to take away the impact of that lesson to you…but I will tell you it has nothing to do with him or your responsibility to your forum. That is your ego speaking and your resistance showing.
You also said, “Now back to my original question Lili - you seem to have formed an opinion of me, which struck me in another post where you felt I had disliked your reply. Lili again I say to you - I am as peaceful and honest as they come. I speak my truth. I live from my heart. I may ruffle feathers occasionally with my words, but it is never intentionally. I can not help how people read my words, or react to them.”
Ahhh but you are right and then you are not…You may not be able to help how other people read or react to your words, but you can CHOOSE your words more carefully so that you might clearly intend how people will read them. There is no issue with whether you are honest, peaceful or truthful. You have told me this several times in several posts so I guess you believe it and are probably trying to defend yourself against someone somewhere whom you think may not believe you.
But this is not the point. The point was how to deal with the guy on your forum…not how to convince me of who or what you are. It’s easy to loose track of the question and to not hear the answer when the ego gets involved.
” I hope that when you read my words you do so with the understanding that every word I type on this or any other forum is an attempt to further my own memory and growth, and to lend Light to the world in return as it awakens and remembers.”
With all due respect my friend, this doesn’t amount to a hill of beans…I can hear you and everyone else screaming now! It’s a defensive tactic of a bruised ego speaking.
What matters is to stop typing and putting out words for defense and allowing yourself to learn to lend light to the world INSIDE YOU as YOU AWAKEN. The rest of the world will take care of itself if you concentrate on YOU…and this is meant for all of us, not JUST you Destra.
“Man i'm wordy lol - sorry - have a hard time condensing my thoughts at times.”
Yes and more importantly, ‘clarifying’ your thoughts in words. Condensing is not as important as clarifying.
”Again, thank you for your guidance above, i'm not sure it helps me to figure out how to deal with this particular banned member, but I appreciate your outlook, your heart, and your honesty.”
How to deal with this banned member is not what matters at all…it’s how to deal with YOURSELF in relationship to this situation. You are looking for someone to tell you the answer Destra and no one will. That’s because no one knows the answer and anyone who presumes to needs a good kick in the pants.
Go inside and do that little exercise. Put your cerebral mind and all it’s thoughts and inner noise on the shelf for a while. Forget what you think you know. Forget about defending your ego and just do the little exercise. Do it until it works. You will know when that is without me telling you.
Coming back here to argue the point or argue a different point isn’t going to help you get the answers your are seeking. I say this not in condemnation of your attempts, but out of compassion. I have been there, done that for a long, long time and the road is rocky and painful to the source. I know you have heard this because there is nothing new under the sun.
Allow your egoic defense to crumble and you will find any answer you seek. It’s all in there. If you can ask the question then you already have the answer and you just need a good poke to go find it. ;D
Love,
Liliahnah
Thank you for replying in the manner that you have. You have given me much food for thought and also helped me to clarify my own next step on my journey.
Recently I have been wondering what it is that has made it so difficult for me to make myself understood, not only to yourself, but to others who are outside the forum.
I have noticed that since the energies have shifted in the last few months I have attempted to communicate with words that had a meaning in the older energies but no longer have the same meaning.
Since I spend so much time spread over several dimensions simultaneously I have often come here and to other situations to which I am called and brought with me energies that are not necessarily of the space I am in and this may be causing some of the confusion.
So my attempts to communicate have often been confounded by my own inability to use the correct words for the concepts I am talking about AND by using the incorrect words for the energetic space I am in. So I thank you for giving me the opportunity to practice by using the correct words to express my thoughts and also an arena in which to do so. I will attempt to match the energies and make my points clear.
But this being a discussion I can only take responsibility for my half of what I perceive as the miscommunication.
The other half of course is the responsibility of the other person.
Having spent all my current life working in the deep metaphysical arena I have often has the opportunity to think very highly of myself and what I know…and have also had the opportunity to fall into my own egoic patterns of thinking that there was nothing left for me to know or to learn or that there was no one who could teach me anything more.
Even when I would go to groups or conferences seeking to learn something new I would often act as though I knew it all and didn’t need to open to anything further. The ego is a strange and elusive thing. It helped to make me defensive and inaccessible to that very thing I sought the most.
This Destra is what I think is getting between you and I from your side of the equation. This is NOT a criticism of you, merely an observation and one you asked me for several times in your posts. You have asked me what it is I see or mentioned something about the ‘opinion I have formed of you’.
Please don’t single this comment out of my response because if you do you will miss the point. J I am not judging this nor am I making it a right/wrong thing. I also don’t want to get off track in this thread and have it go to a he said/she said thing or a “have to defend or takes sides with one or the other”.
I admire and respect what you ‘appear’ to be doing on your own path. I say ‘appear’ because I can only respond to what I am reading here. But I will give you my open, unabashed feedback here.
I think it is very common for people of knowledge and training to fall into the trap of ego and inaccessibility. I also think it is very common for people in this state to be overly sensitive to any comments that might be perceived as criticism and to then miss the point of what the other is saying. That is the ego defending it’s precarious stance so as not to crumble into a pile of dust leaving the person in a shambles of confusion and disillusionment.
In my original post in this thread I mentioned you by name because the subject matter of this post is very relevant to you and also I have offered it to you in the thread about your cheek and the ‘thing’ on it. Twice I was misunderstood in my attempt to get my point across.
Here, you initially asked me how you can deal with forum members who are abusive in some way or another. I gave you an answer but I suspect you did not do what I suggested, did you? Did you actually sit down and do the exercise?
My sense tells me you have remained in your head about this problem and not allowed yourself to go into your feelings and heart and follow the simple directions. I said to you and all that if you do this exercise correctly you will be surprised by what comes out on the other side. From your more recent comments I sense you have not even tried this.
Instead you ‘assumed’ I was alleging you were a ‘confrontational’ person. I never said that, only that I thought you and this guy were locking horns, in other words not seeing eye-to-eye on something.
Actually now that you mention it, I DO INDEED think you are confrontational, but not in a traditional, hard-nosed aggressive manner…rather in a more occult, argumentative manner. It seems you want to have your way…You asked for help, got a direct answer and then didn’t follow the guidance and came back feeling accused and opening up a kind of argumentative confrontation looking for something which I will not nor cannot give you. Answers that are outside yourself.
You said, “However in this case, after having given this to the Angels and letting their wisdom wash upon me, I feel the only lesson provided to me here is to stay steadfast in my responsibility to my forum energy.”
Ah, but this is the first place where the ego enters and not only that but you put this outside yourself instead of going inside and doing this simple little exercise I showed you.
If the only lesson you learned was to stay steadfast in your responsibility to your forum then you have entirely missed the point. This guy is your teacher and a very good one too. I imagine he will plague the crap out of you and your forum until you learn the real lesson that is awaiting you. And I am not going to tell you what it is because I don’t want to take away the impact of that lesson to you…but I will tell you it has nothing to do with him or your responsibility to your forum. That is your ego speaking and your resistance showing.
You also said, “Now back to my original question Lili - you seem to have formed an opinion of me, which struck me in another post where you felt I had disliked your reply. Lili again I say to you - I am as peaceful and honest as they come. I speak my truth. I live from my heart. I may ruffle feathers occasionally with my words, but it is never intentionally. I can not help how people read my words, or react to them.”
Ahhh but you are right and then you are not…You may not be able to help how other people read or react to your words, but you can CHOOSE your words more carefully so that you might clearly intend how people will read them. There is no issue with whether you are honest, peaceful or truthful. You have told me this several times in several posts so I guess you believe it and are probably trying to defend yourself against someone somewhere whom you think may not believe you.
But this is not the point. The point was how to deal with the guy on your forum…not how to convince me of who or what you are. It’s easy to loose track of the question and to not hear the answer when the ego gets involved.
” I hope that when you read my words you do so with the understanding that every word I type on this or any other forum is an attempt to further my own memory and growth, and to lend Light to the world in return as it awakens and remembers.”
With all due respect my friend, this doesn’t amount to a hill of beans…I can hear you and everyone else screaming now!
It’s a defensive tactic of a bruised ego speaking.What matters is to stop typing and putting out words for defense and allowing yourself to learn to lend light to the world INSIDE YOU as YOU AWAKEN. The rest of the world will take care of itself if you concentrate on YOU…and this is meant for all of us, not JUST you Destra.
“Man i'm wordy lol - sorry - have a hard time condensing my thoughts at times.”
Yes and more importantly, ‘clarifying’ your thoughts in words. Condensing is not as important as clarifying.
”Again, thank you for your guidance above, i'm not sure it helps me to figure out how to deal with this particular banned member, but I appreciate your outlook, your heart, and your honesty.”
How to deal with this banned member is not what matters at all…it’s how to deal with YOURSELF in relationship to this situation. You are looking for someone to tell you the answer Destra and no one will. That’s because no one knows the answer and anyone who presumes to needs a good kick in the pants.
Go inside and do that little exercise. Put your cerebral mind and all it’s thoughts and inner noise on the shelf for a while. Forget what you think you know. Forget about defending your ego and just do the little exercise. Do it until it works. You will know when that is without me telling you.
Coming back here to argue the point or argue a different point isn’t going to help you get the answers your are seeking. I say this not in condemnation of your attempts, but out of compassion. I have been there, done that for a long, long time and the road is rocky and painful to the source. I know you have heard this because there is nothing new under the sun.
Allow your egoic defense to crumble and you will find any answer you seek. It’s all in there. If you can ask the question then you already have the answer and you just need a good poke to go find it.
;DLove,
Liliahnah
